The Pants Offensive

A SWAT team officer was left hanging 20 stories high on the side of a building during a high priority raid of a corporate high-rise where a disturbed office worker took several hostages in an armed standoff.

After being rescued from the side of the building after hanging for several hours with his pants around his ankles, officer White said, “It wouldn’t have been so bad, except that the perp saw my ass hanging in the window and thought it was a scare tactic.  He then doubled all his demands and became more violent, threatening to harm the hostages if I didn’t stop pressing my butt cheeks against the window.  But I couldn’t help it.  There wasn’t much I could do.  Not much at all.  Stupid pants.”